Older Women

Feature 2 – May 2020 – Grace & Truth Magazine

Older Women

Godly Women Who Pass It On
Do you know the phrase “an old wives’ tale”? It is an English saying which refers to traditional statements about life that do not necessarily have a basis in fact. There are all kinds of these tales and stories, such as how to tell if an expectant mother is pregnant with a boy or a girl, or how to stay healthy by eating certain foods or doing some kind of activity. Sometimes these ideas contain traditional wisdom that turns out to be true – an apple a day really can help keep the doctor away! – but many times such tales are actually the complete opposite of proven facts.

Since these stories are called “old wives’ tales,” it shows that older women are known for making interesting but sometimes questionable observations about life. The phrase has been a well-worn saying in the English language for centuries. As far back as the early 1600s, it was familiar enough that the translators of the King James Version of the Bible used it in 1 Timothy 4:7, where Timothy was told to reject false teachings which would lead believers astray. The KJV uses the phrase “old wives’ fables” to emphasize that such teachings should be considered foolish, fit only for gossiping old women who care more about storytelling than about truth.

While this was and still is an important warning, it is far from the complete picture we get from the Bible about older women! In the Old Testament we see women like Deborah, a prophetess and a “mother in Israel” who was spiritual enough to judge the people when they came to seek her counsel (Jud. 4:4-5, 5:7 NKJV). We see the faith of Sarah, who is celebrated in the New Testament because at the age of 90 she gave birth to Isaac, having “judged Him faithful who had promised” (Heb. 11:11).

In addition to examples like these, several New Testament passages describe the wonderful characteristics of godly older women whom God used to guide and encourage others. These women fill a unique and important role, not only among families but also in the body of Christ generally.

First Epistle To Timothy
The first passage to consider is found in 1 Timothy 5:3-10. These verses describe the older widow who, if bereaved of all family members, should be cared for financially by the local believers with whom she fellowships. Here is a list of her traits:

• She trusts in God and prays often. One temptation for middle-aged and older believers is to think that their wisdom and experiences have prepared them for all the challenges of life as they dispense advice to others. This older woman, though, knows she must depend on the Lord at any age! Moreover, in older years physical activities naturally diminish, yet it is an excellent investment of time and energy to maintain an active prayer list. Many have testified to the influence of a praying grandmother or some other godly woman who faithfully remembered them in the time of prayer.

• She has been faithful to her husband. The text says she has been “the wife of one man” (v.9). This does not negate the possibility that, for example, some tragedy took her first husband and she remarried. The point is that she has displayed marital fidelity. No relationship is so demanding as marriage, but a godly older woman who has shown both character and commitment in marriage is to be honored.

• She has a reputation for good works. We do not know the age of Dorcas, but she was “full of good works” (Acts 9:36) and known for making clothing of all kinds to give away. At her death, everyone remembered the acts of kindness she had done for others as unto the Lord. Always keep in mind that people will not remember us for our bank accounts!

• She was a devoted mother. She did not just have children; she raised them – there is a great difference. The term implies nourishing and developing our young ones. With intention and insight she encouraged positive traits, corrected negative habits and trained her children in godliness and reverence.

• She has shown hospitality. A busy home can still be an open home, and both the husband and wife must be united in this (see 1 Tim. 3:2). Hospitality is more about a welcoming attitude than having a lavish space for entertaining. The godly older woman knows this; yet hospitality is also an expected trait of all Christians (consider 1 Pet. 4:9), and would to God that we all felt freer to display it!

• She cares about the little things that refresh others. The text says, “She has washed the saints’ feet” (1 Tim. 5:10). While this may have a figurative meaning (as we often speak about washing one another’s feet with the Word of God), there is surely a literal aspect to this act of thoughtfulness and humility. It was considered a common courtesy, yet it was not always done (Lk. 7:44). This older woman perceives the weariness of others and brings something refreshing to them, whether spiritually or literally.

• She is compassionate. An older woman is often a keen observer who notices that others are going through deep troubles. For some the ordinary pressures of life become extra difficult, others face genuine oppression in a personal way. This godly older woman is compassionate and can provide relief. She does not run the other way when troubled people come to her!

• She is consistently kind. This woman diligently follows every good work, implying that she travels a straight course and does not turn aside from doing what is good. It is her habit and manner of life. She is motivated not by a desire for recognition but by the kindness God displays to all (Lk. 6:35).

Epistle To Titus
Taken collectively these are wonderful qualities for older sisters! To supplement these thoughts, another helpful passage is found in Titus 2:1-8. As a servant of the Lord among the Christians on the island of Crete, Titus was to make this subject a matter of specific teaching by instructing older men, older women and young men about the lifestyle that would honor the Lord. Notice, however, that Titus was not asked personally to teach young women about these things, for that kind of teaching ought to come from the older women.

Regular teaching of this sort is significant. Sometimes as believers we are quite capable of discussing the great doctrines and truths of Christianity, but we find ourselves less comfortable with what has been called “practical teaching.” Some have even implied that these day-to-day applications are secondary in importance to “doctrinal teaching.” The Scriptures do not support this view. That is not to say that doctrinal matters are secondary to practical applications! Instead, the scriptural view is that neither the doctrinal nor the practical is secondary; both go together in an essential way. Titus 2:1 emphasizes this fact: “Speak the things which are proper for sound doctrine.” If we present sound doctrine but do not emphasize its day-to-day implications, then our teaching is incomplete at best and literally defective at worst.

The subjects for older women listed for Titus expand beautifully on what we have already considered. They include:

• She should be reverent in behavior. Her actions are well-suited for a holy person. She should stand out because she is known for the Christian difference that ought to mark all believers.

• She avoids malicious gossip. She is not a “slanderer.” It is shocking to realize this is the same word which is usually used to refer to the devil! The devil is an accuser – that is what the word means – and godly women will refuse to participate in his work. It is worth noting that this trait is a concern for younger women as well (1 Tim. 5:13).

• She is not a drunkard. No man who has trouble with alcohol is to be recognized as a Christian leader, and a godly older sister is held to the same principle. Sometimes we think that alcohol and drunkenness are temptations only for young people, but the sins of the flesh are a challenge for any age. We must be vigilant to help those who struggle in this area.

• She is capable of teaching what is good. It is wonderful when older believers model righteous behavior for those who are younger; but it is even better when those who are older can actually explain how to develop that character. For older women, teaching these good things specifically involves admonishing young women about a God-honoring lifestyle. It requires active, intentional, verbal training. This implies that these older women had already learned the same lessons by experience. Therefore we can add the following qualities to our list:

• She loves her husband and her children. Since these traits were also mentioned in 1 Timothy 5, we recognize that devotion to family is a key aspect of godliness for Christian wives and mothers.

• She is well-balanced in thought and behavior. This term would be worth deeper consideration all by itself! It has the idea of being well-regulated, self-controlled and discreet. An older woman should teach a young woman how to think and act in ways that are consistently godly.

• She is chaste. A morally pure lifestyle stands out; yet it is not difficult for immodest, flirtatious or unholy words and actions to mar the purity of any believer. A godly older woman will specifically address this in her conversations with younger sisters.

• She is attentive to her household. This word is used only here in the entire New Testament. In classical Greek it was used to describe a keeper of the house – not a “housekeeper” in the sense of a maid, but a watchful person who expended effort to provide what was needed for the family. Proverbs 31:27 elaborates nicely on this point by describing a woman who “watches over the ways of her household, and does not eat the bread of idleness.”

• She is good. The Lord Jesus said only God is good (see Mk. 10:18); but as believers we can be good too! Barnabas was called “a good man” (Acts 11:24), and these older sisters also know what it means to be good. Their actions are excellent, honorable, helpful and kind-hearted.

• She practices a submissive attitude. Some English translations use the phrase “obedient to their own husbands” here (Ti. 2:5), but the idea of submission is probably more accurate. Marriage is a headship relationship, which is different from a master-servant relationship. Husbands are nowhere instructed to demand obedience from their wives! Still, it is interesting to realize that Sarah, the godly wife of Abraham, is described as choosing to obey her husband (1 Pet. 3:6). In her heart she viewed him as her “lord” (consider Gen. 18:12). A godly woman is certainly not shy about expressing her thoughts, yet in the marriage relationship she honors her husband and allows him to function in the place of responsibility God intends him to have.

These traits are pleasant, but that is not the full measure of their importance. They are significant because they actually prevent unbelievers from making accusations against the Bible (Ti. 2:5). When Christians live out their faith in ways that are consistent with biblical principles, it shows that the Bible can be trusted. Thank God for women of faith who, in every generation, have served as pillars in Christian assemblies by displaying the results of a godly life.

By Stephen Campbell