Polygamy And Christian Values
Issues – September 2013 – Grace & Truth Magazine
Polygamy And Christian Values
Polygamy, the act of having more than one spouse at the same time, is readily accepted in many African countries and among certain groups elsewhere. It is even promoted at times, such as in August 2011 when President Omar al-Bashir urged Sudanese men to take more than one wife to increase Sudan’s population and aid the country’s development.
1
In some Sudanese societies, men desire “more wives and more children for greater production and an increase in wealth (cattle) and prestige ... showing the blessing of God and ancestors.”
2
Christian leaders need to clearly teach believers what God wants, having revealed His instruction in the Bible, which is against these sincerely held cultural and economic ideas.
Pastoral Care
People involved in polygamy before their Christian conversion must be ministered to with sensitive Christian love and care. “Only God can work out a solution,” 3 as every case will be different. It will take prayer and patience, but there is no reason why baptism need be withheld if and when genuine repentance is obviously seen (Acts 10:47-48). If the marital state is thought best to be retained for the sake of the wives and children, this can be seen as “a temporary basis.” Biblically proper patterns of Christian family living are waited for, as “changes are made generationally.” 4 This gradually transforms a culture one family at a time, through the careful pastoral application of God’s truth.
Concerning Church Leadership
Leadership in the local or national church is a different matter, and it should not be permitted to polygamists (1 Tim. 3:2, Ti. 1:5-9). God’s ideal is clear: the church leader must be “the husband of but one wife” (1 Tim. 3:2, Ti. 1:6 NIV). The application of this must be done to cause as little hurt and disruption as possible, while clearly taking steps towards God’s ideal. “He must manage his own family well” (1 Tim. 3:4) and “he must have a good reputation with outsiders” (1 Tim. 3:7) apply serious challenges to the polygamist trying to practice his newfound Christian discipleship.
Biblical References To Polygamy
The differences between Old and New Testaments are testimony to how “over the years, God slowly changed His people in the direction of monogamy,” 5 away from the sinful polygamy into which they had fallen. They had forgotten God’s Creation ideal. In the beginning, God provided only one Eve for Adam in His perfect world (Gen. 2:22-25; 3:20). Polygamy was, and is, not the will of God.
The first to break this standard was Lamech (Gen. 4:19-24), which led inevitably to the situation in Genesis 6:1-2 “When men began to increase in number ... the sons of God saw that the daughters of men were beautiful, and they married any of them they chose.” God’s heart was broken by man’s wickedness and evil thoughts (Gen. 6:5-6). It mattered so much to Him that God destroyed almost everybody on earth (Gen. 6:7-8,11-13).
Although there are examples of polygamy in the Bible, they are not put there as good examples for us to follow. The reason they are there is to show us how “to understand God’s actions in the midst of tragic human history.” 6 Think of the problems caused by Abraham’s two “wives” and their children (Gen. 16-17, 21), even by their descendants today. What is commonplace in some societies, African and others, is offensive to Almighty God. One may notice that our Lord Jesus referred “family” matters directly back to Genesis (Mt. 19:3-9; see also Mt. 5:31-32, Mk. 10:2-12, Lk. 16:16-18).
Concluding Thoughts
Reading the works of several students of African societies, I conclude that the reasons people give for keeping polygamy are ultimately for personal pride or a lack of trust in God. Such reasoning based on pride includes having symbols for power, influence and wealth – to be given honor in society while keeping the family name alive. Reasons that show a lack of trust in God include the idea that through this manner of life one will avoid sexual immorality; that there will be enough family workers for field and home with help in times of sickness and hardship; that the father will receive a good bride price for his daughters; and that by having enough children a person will insure security in old age.
Both personal pride and a lack of trust in God are sins against God! God’s wisdom calls out, “I hate pride and arrogance” (Prov. 8:13). He also says, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will make your paths straight” (Prov. 3:5-6).
Of course, people who become polygamous after converting to Christianity are simply rebelling against God’s design and inviting His judgement on themselves. May each believer be careful to “live a life worthy of the Lord and please Him in every way” (Col. 1:10).
By Colin Salter
FOOTNOTES
1. Sudan pushes polygamy (BBC News on line) 15/08/11.
2. Peter Reat Gatkuoth, Perception of polygamous marriage in Sudan (Sudan Tribune) 16/09/07.
3. Wilbur O’Donovan, Biblical Christianity in African Perspective (Paternoster Press: Carlisle) 1992, p.171, 288-292.
4. David Hesselgrave, Communicating Christ Cross Culturally (Zondervan: Grand Rapids) 1991, p. 121- 2, 128-9.
5. Bedru Hussain, Polygamy – an Ethical case study (rector of Meserete Kristos College: Addis Abiba) online, 2002.
6. Lionel Windsor, Polygamy in the Bible: a Sordid Tale (The Briefing: matthiasmedia.com/briefing: Epsom UK) September/October 2012
Polygamists In The Bible
Lamech • Genesis 4:19
Abraham • Genesis 16:3
Esau • Genesis 26:34; 28:9
Jacob • Genesis 29:20-30;
30:3-4, 9
Gideon • Judges 8:30
Elkanah • 1 Samuel 1:2
David • 1 Samuel 18:7;
2 Samuel 3:2-5
Solomon • 1 Kings 3:1; 11:3
Rehoboam • 2 Chronicles 11:18-21
Abijah • 2 Chronicles 13:21
Joash • 2 Chronicles 24:3